Four Month Update

Hello Friends and Family!!

Whew...it has been SUCH a crazy month since I last updated!
Let's get to the important stuff first...I stepped on the scale on October 1, 2011, exactly 4 months after starting this life changing journey, and I have lost 47 pounds total!!
Honestly, I am in awe.  God is so good to me and I feel so humbled that He continues to shed His grace on me as I continue down this path to wholeness.

A little over 3 weeks ago, my mother in law and special needs sister in law moved in with us unexpectedly. It has certainly been a trial to say the least.  I am trying with all my heart to keep a positive attitude and view this as a ministry, although some days are easier than others to have that attitude!  I literally feel like the only way I am going to survive this new challenge in my life is to take it one day at a time.  I told my kids that we needed to stop complaining about it because we don't want to be like the Israelites and have to wander through our "wilderness" for 40 years!!!!

Having the responsibility of taking care of two additional people has definitely brought on more stress in my life and I have found myself not being as strict as I should be with my eating.  It is so easy to slip back into old habits if I am not careful!  For me, the key is to stay alert!  Even just eating too many helpings of roasted vegetables.  I  have to check myself and make sure that I am eating for strength and not to stuff my emotions.  Making sure that I make time to exercise and prepare healthy meals for myself has also been a challenge at times.

So here goes...confession time..
A couple of weeks ago I found myself in the parking lot of Starbucks drinking a venti pumpkin spice latte with whipped cream and eating an apple fritter from Hegedorn's!  My daughter, Ally was with me, and as I sat there eating, I looked at her face just staring at me...to which she says, "Do you feel guilty?" Honestly, I didn't.  I just felt like I wanted it. I felt like I almost needed it.  Wrong answer.  It is so easy for me  to feel like a donut will fill the stressful moments instead of picking up my Bible or scripture cards! The good news is that I got right back on my plan the next day and decided that the donut wasn't going to be the end of all the good choices I had made in the previous months since embarking on this journey.  Once again, God in His great  mercy, showed me just how much He loves me by giving me the power to get back on track!  That has been such an area of weakness in my life in the past, and I was not about to go back to that place.

So, four months in, and I gotta say that I really feel like I don't even care that much about junk food anymore.  Even pasta doesn't call me the way it used to.  But, I will admit that there are some days (like the day at Starbucks) where it is just plain HARD to stick to the plan!  I pretty much feel like this journey will be life-long. It may get a little easier at times, but I think there will always be the bumps in the road.  I may take a step backwards and two steps forward, but I am determined to stay on the path, no matter what.  No giving up..I will reach my goal..and I'm only 3 pounds away from the half way mark of my first goal of losing 100 pounds!  Even after my goals are met, I am determined to stay on the path..to never go back to being morbidly obese. Ever.

With school underway, and my in laws are getting a little more settled into our routine, (They are only here temporarily) I will try to get back to updating my blog every other week, and maybe even once a week again.  Five kids, in laws, volleyball games, a senior preparing for college, etc. has really taken much of my time, and I ask you to forgive me for not keeping up with my writing and pictures!

I am so very thankful for my praying friends and those who love me and continue to encourage me!  We have begun the Made To Crave Bible study once again and I am so excited to see all that God has for us as we go through the book again.  We have some new people in our study this time around and I feel so blessed to be a part of such an amazing group of ladies.  Please continue to pray for us.

I am working on putting together some recipes and meal ideas that I have used throughout the past four months.  Several people have asked what I eat, so I figured I would share some of my favorite recipes.  I should have those posted soon.

"May God himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through.  May your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.  The one who calls you is faithful and he will do it."  I Thessalonians 5:23-24

Many blessings to you and yours...

I'm Still Here and Still on the Journey

Hello Friends and Family!
I am still here and still on the journey!! It's been a busy couple of weeks! I didn't get a chance to update last week.  I stepped on the scale last Wednesday and I didn't lose, and since I was preparing to leave for FL the next day, I didn't take the time to update my blog.

When I arrived in FL last Thursday evening, I was talking to my Mom about my weight loss and how it was getting a little frustrating since I have been exercising almost every single day, and even increasing the intensity.  She asked me what I eat in a typical day, and I told her that I was consuming quite a bit of fresh fruit.  Like almost living on it, because I LOVE fruit!  She suggested that I eliminate fruit just for 2 weeks and see if that makes a difference.  Maybe I was consuming too much natural sugar, which equals a lot of calories!  Well, I did as she said and I lost FIVE POUNDS this week!!!!

Who knows, it could be the way my crazy body works or it could be that I was, in fact, eating way too much fruit!  So, I will go another week without any fruit at all and then gradually add a small amount back into my diet.  She explained that fruit should always be eaten in small amounts, especially when trying to lose weight.

It's amazing the things I am learning as I continue this journey! 

Since June 1, I have lost 40 pounds!  I am feeling better than ever and SO thankful for your prayers!! God is so good and I continue to press on and let Him carry me through each day!

I Can Run!

Hello my friends and family!!
Well, I am down another one pound this week!  From everything I read and hear, slow and steady weight loss is the best way to lose and gives me a higher chance of keeping the weight off!  Honestly, one pound was a little sad since I ran 4 days this week so far!  I just keep telling myself that losing one pound is still a loss..and my plan is to live this new lifestyle for the rest of my life, so eventually I will hit my goal weight!

I am feeling amazing!  I've incorporated just a little more whole grain into my diet, just because I seem to get hungrier since I've been training for the 5k.

Last week on a very hectic day, and after not eating all day long, I came home at 8:30pm, famished and ready to eat everything in sight. I actually had a small dish of white pasta. (I know-shocking!)  I didn't want to do it, but I was feeling desperate, and it's what was available and I figured it was probably a better option than the ice cream in the freezer.  I ate it and honestly didn't even really enjoy it..I was wishing for fish and grilled veggies, really.  I also did not go into any type of self-condemnation at all.  If I would have done that then it would have been easy for me to spiral out of control and eat anything I wanted since I "failed" anyways..but I kept my head on straight.  I ate the pasta, and then got out of the kitchen and back to the work I was doing.  That's just my little confession..and I honestly felt like I had conquered something, really, because my biggest "temptation" has always been pasta, and to put it in my mouth and not want to eat the entire pan was serious progress for me!  I didn't even want more..I just wanted to fill my starving belly and get on with what I had to do the rest of the night!  However, what I should have done was to prepare myself for the day and made something healthy and kept it in the fridge for when I got home and taken healthy snacks with me to eat throughout the day.  Honestly, in the past couple of months I have learned to carry healthy snacks (fruit or veggies) with me if I am out and about, but on that particular day I just neglected to prepare myself for the day. 

I've also noticed that I do not look at my scriptures as often as I used to.  It became like second nature to me to just open up my notebook and recite verses during the day and especially when I felt cravings.  I am sad to say that I have not kept up with it as I should, and I have definitely noticed that I feel like I have more cravings..it is something I am going back to immediately.  I can never, ever think that I no longer need to rely on the Word of God.  It is what has sustained me throughout this journey and I cannot slack in this area at all.  My spiritual "diet" is far more important than my physical diet!

So that is my update for the week.  I covet your prayers as I continue this journey.  Every day is another opportunity to completely die to myself and become the self-disciplined woman that I am in Christ!  I'm also on week two on the couch to 5k training program, and am feeling unbelievable!! Thank you all for loving me and praying for me!!

And so the training begins...

Stepped on the scale this morning and lost another 2 pounds!  I was a bit nervous, since I ate way more cooked foods that I would have liked this past week.  I chose only healthy, whole grains like brown rice and whole wheat bread, but I found myself craving those carbs this week and it was making me a little nervous.  I'm learning to find a good balance in my diet.  Trying not to be afraid of food even if it is healthy and good for my body. 

So August 1st marked 2 months since I began this journey to wholeness.  33 pounds gone and I am amazed at the energy level I now have, as well as the increased endurance I now posses!  On Sunday, July 31, I began training for my very first 5k.  I am doing the 'couch to 5k' training program, and I will admit that I was very surprised that I was able to complete the first 2 days of the training schedule!  The 5k is scheduled for October 15, so with God by my side and consistent training over the next two months, I believe I can do this!  I know it's going to be very hard work, but I am up for the challenge and excited to meet this goal!

I am so thankful for your prayers and encouragement!  Please continue to pray for me as I tread down this path, holding the hand of my Savior, taking on new challenges and gaining new strength in Him.  I thank God for all He continues to do in my life.

I love to watch the scale go DOWN

31 pounds GONE in 8 weeks!  I am doing my happy dance! :)

Vacation, Family, Emotions and Continued Weightloss..

Hello Friends!
I am still alive and well!  We were on vacation last week, and I decided that I would spend as much time with my family as possible, which also meant that my time on the computer was very limited.  We spent the week on Conesus Lake with my siblings and parents, and had a fantastic time!

We celebrated my parents 70th birthdays with a fabulous menu of favorite Italian foods, and by the grace of God, I stayed on my food plan 100%.  I rarely experience cravings anymore, to which I am extremely grateful.

However, as the week progressed, there were a few intense moments which family can only bring on..emotions can surface so easily with the people we love the most.  I found myself feeling those emotions more than ever before, and then it dawned on me that in the past I have always numbed myself with food when I started to 'feel' anything.  It was not uncommon for me to grab a cookie or bread, anything to stuff my emotions and not have to deal with them.  I found myself extremely upset on a few different occasions, and realized that I now need to figure out the best way to communicate and deal with these emotions since I have removed my 'medication' from my life.  I am happy to say that I did talk these emotions out with my family, admitted where I was wrong and we moved on, and continued to have a fantastic time together!  I am so very thankful for a family who is open to communicate, who love each other so deeply, enough to admit when we are wrong and continue to love one another despite our weaknesses and flaws.  We are blessed indeed!

Monday was another day full of emotions. We came home a little sunburned and exhausted and I literally felt like having a temper tantrum!!  I was just feeling anxious about a lot of things, and I wanted so badly to just start eating everything!!  I have to honestly say that it was the first time I felt like that since the beginning of this journey.  It took everything I had to stay out of that kitchen.  I was seriously ready to make a dish of pasta and then top it off with some brownies!!  But GOD, in His GREAT MERCY had compassion on me and made a way of escape!  This new mind He has given me began to think much more clearly than I have in a very long time.  I told myself that it was okay to feel these emotions, but it was not okay to stuff my face and slip back into my old habits so easily.  Once again I found myself sitting on the couch filled with frustration.  The longer I sat there, the more peace I felt as I poured my heart out to my heavenly Father.  After about an hour I felt completely at peace with myself and with God.  My heart was so grateful of His promise to never leave us.  The 'escape' that He made for me was to go back into the kitchen and have a piece of Ezekiel bread , toasted and slathered with natural peanut butter and enjoy the good food I have available to me.  What an intense feeling to make a conscious healthy choice after dealing with the emotions I was feeling, instead of diving into the refrigerator or pantry, full force, full of emotion and mindlessly stuffing my face.  Can I say it again?? God is so GOOD!
 
So, last Wednesday I weighed myself and lost a whopping FIVE pounds!  Since there was no loss the week before, I was ecstatic to see these results!!

Today, I stepped on the scale and I lost another TWO pounds!  I continue to work out at the YMCA, take bike rides with my family, and am eating only fresh, clean foods.  I start every morning with a bowl of oatmeal topped with fresh fruit.  Lunch is usually a fresh fruit salad, or green salad.  I try to keep my lunch all raw, although sometimes I do have some cooked vegetables and/or chicken.  Dinner is lean meat or fish (I rarely eat red meat) and fresh (cooked or raw) vegetables.  If I do feel like I need a snack in the afternoon or evening, I always choose a fresh piece of fruit or raw veggies.  Occasionally I will have a piece or two of Ezekiel bread (which is a sprouted grain bread) with natural peanut butter and all fruit spread or honey.  I try not to eat too much grain since I just feel that much better without it.  I have commited to God that I will not consume any sugar or processed foods until I reach my goal weight.

I am thankful that even in the midst of my crazy emotions, that God continues to be faithful.  His promises are true, His peace is there for us to take hold of and His mercies are never ending!  I continue to take this journey one day at a time and I am humbled that He continues to carry me despite my weaknesses.

I will be posting new pictures this afternoon!

New Pic..

Although the scale recorded no weight loss this week, I am keeping up with pictures.  I decided at the beginning of this journey to post a new picture of myself every other week.  24 lbs in 6 weeks!!

24 lbs GONE